This Is How I Met Your Daddy

29th April 2016

Today marks the 10th wedding anniversary for Kim and me. But it seemed like yesterday that we fell in love, stayed in love and married each other.

I am not one who is good with numbers so more often than not, Kim is the one who reminds me how many years we knew each other, our Nth wedding anniversary and etc.

It probably doesn’t matter that much to me because I know that this is one man I will stay married and committed to; so I lost count. hehe… good excuse. Smile

On a church trip to Israel – circa Year 2004. I almost can’t recognise myself here!

This is part of a blog train “This is how I met your Father” hosted by one of the mummy bloggers, Michelle, in my blogging network. Hopping on to share a personal love story as it etches onto my memory and I hope that my 2 boys will read about it one day especially when they reach the I-don’t-want-to-talk-to-you-teenagehood-years.

Boys, this is how I met your Dad.

FIRST IMPRESSIONS

We were junior college mates to begin with. Kim was in the Science faculty while I was in the Commerce faculty. Our paths seldom cross until we were elected into the 19th Student Council (SC). In 1996, we were merely SC friends and being in different faculties, we seldom talked except in groups in the student council room. His initial impression of me was horrible to say the least. I was this obnoxious, irritating, BOSSY and arrogant Executive-Committee member who likes to boss people around and stick my head into discussions. Admittedly, I was probably over zealous in too many things during college days.

And my first impression of him is : I can’t remember anything of him! hahaha! Except when I tried very hard to recall, there was this very normal incident when all the SC members had to build a “ghost house” for a funfair; he was one of the guys who went to buy bamboo poles together. And that’s it. Zero impression.

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I don’t know why we looked so dishevelled here! I think it was when we were rehearsing for a cheerleading act.
But this is one of the rare photos we took before we were attached.

IMPRESS UPON ME

In Year 2 of college days, we had more interaction as we approach the end of our term as student councillors. He became more prominent because of his musical and leadership skills. He was taking the lead in bigger student events and suddenly his guitar and music skills came into use when the SC were organising chapel worship sessions (we were in a Christian college). What made me noticed him was that everyone was asking him to teach them guitar. He is good at his skills but irritating as a guitar teacher because he “motivates” by showing you the hardest pieces first. He still is the same now except that I gave up learning guitar from him! So, my dear sons, learn a musical instrument if you want to impress girls. Smile with tongue out

We stepped down from SC in the mid of Year 2 and it was an extremely emotional stage. Using his music-writing skills, Kim wrote a parting song for all of us at SC and we cried buckets of tears as we celebrate the friendships built within the SC and with the entire student cohort. That’s another story by itself. But all those months was the built-up to the start of a relationship between us. Actually I can’t remember the details of how feelings between us emerged. But we knew it all started from friendships.

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The whole student council as we “celebrate” stepping down as councillors. Can you find Kim and me? Smile

I remembered there was a school camp which we were organising and we stayed overnight together with many others. That night, he indicated that he had some feelings for another girl (!!!!!) and me (!!!!!). hahaa…. the peak of teenage-manhood!? I was like…ok … so how… it became a little awkward initially. I didn’t like love triangles –not my kind of thing. Shortly after that night, he sorted out his thoughts and feelings. He called me one night and told me one long story of A,B and C. Till today, he is one good story teller. I fell for it and am still falling for his stories!

Few days later, he was sending me home from school. I stayed really far away from school – about 1.5 hours of bus ride to reach home. He took good advantage of the long journey and we talked and talked. I cannot remember the minute details (memories are failing me!). I only remembered I held his hands in acknowledgement of his confessions and we were a “couple” after that bus ride home. He held my hands tight; almost afraid I will regret and let go! Kim specifically recorded the momentous date – 31st July 1997. Interestingly, our first son was born on 31st July 2009 – 12 years later! “God-incidences”? Smile

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In Student Councillors get-up. Circa – Year 1997

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MARATHON LOVE JOURNEY

Thinking back, I was like – Isn’t 18/19 years old kind of young??!! If my son tells me at 18 years old that he has a girlfriend, I might demand to meet the girl immediately! haha. Protective-mom on full alert!

But it did kind of felt right then.

Our relationship was not without hiccups along the way. We are possibly poles apart in our likes and dislikes, interest and hobbies. Kim is quiet(er) than me, introvert and more action-less-word kind of person. He enjoys (English) music, playing his guitar, learning new instruments, Maths and Sciences, general knowledge. I am loud, talkative, impatient and cannot-sit-still-type. I enjoy socialising, chatting with friends, food and (Mandarin) songs, drama serials. But it seemed that opposites do attract! We built similarities and common interests and friends over the years. Most importantly we shared the same faith which is the foundation of our relationship and later on, marriage.

Being involved with each other’s lives helped in the continuation of our boy-girl relationship. After my graduation, I decided to join Singapore Airlines as  a flight stewardess. Many church friends were not for it and cited this could possibly be a break-up point in our relationship. But Kim was very supportive and asked me to pursue my “dream”. Together, we went through his 2.5 years of army, 1 year of overseas working trip, 3 to 6 months of overseas school programmes and my 2 years of SQ life. The truth is we almost decided to part ways twice in our 9 years of relationship, but thankfully we never did.

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Since the Korean drama DOTS is very trendy now, here’s one of us in his army days. Smile – Circa Year 1998
My graduation trip with friends to Thailand – Year 2002
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Not our wedding! This was taken during his commission ball during OCS days in the army. One of the speeches that left me a deep impression during this ball was what one of the guys who went on stage said: “If the girl sitting next to you is the same person when you first joined the army, you are very lucky”. How true?!
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Took the opportunity during our wedding photo shoot to take memory photos of me in kebaya.

MARRIAGE PROPOSAL IN THE SACRED LAND

Nearing the 8th year of our relationship, we knew that we were ready to take the relationship to the next stage. He secretly planned and executed a marriage proposal when we were in Israel on a church trip. I honestly never see it coming! And I always thought I will be able to guess when he will propose! I knew he was going to propose one day; but I just didn’t expect it there and then and in a foreign land. He managed to borrow a guitar, wrote and sang a compelling song where he tricked me into saying YES in order to complete the song! He brought along a ring to accompany the whole action. How to say no lah. After the whole episode, he told me he just wanted to get rid of the ring because he was worried of losing it during the trip! So he “got rid of it” on my finger!!

Celebrating right after the proposal and the ring that he needed to “get rid of”

AND THEY LIVE HAPPILY EVER AFTER  …….

We got married in church on 29th April 2006. Kim wrote an English cum Mandarin song because he knew my preferences. Here’s a blog post I wrote few years back with a video clip of the song he composed: https://evespiration.com/2013/04/29/i-wanna-spend-my-life-with-you-2/

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How I met your Daddy

No marriage comes with a fairy-tale ending. But that’s what make life interesting. We can chat about almost anything and yet also appreciate silence when needed. And it is true that opposites attract! We filled up the gaps in each other lives. He is the rational, logical and pragmatic one whereas I am the spontaneous, chatty and emotional half. He is our finance and strategy director while I am the events and activities coordinator.

Today marks our 10th wedding anniversary. It is definitely not sun and roses everyday in our relationship and marriage; we have our fair share of quarrels, tears and getting mad days. But I am thankful that I found a man whom I can depend on for life – my friend, my husband and my love.

And just for my husband whose love language is words of affirmation, here are 10 reasons why I love this man:

1) He washes the toilets. I never ever need to wash any toilets in my life because I don’t like it. I will always take other chores such as washing dishes or mopping the floor over washing toilets. Save cleaning airplane toilets, I never need to wash our house’s toilets because Kim volunteers willingly. (I did break the records recently when the helper went back for home leave and the man is very busy)

2) 9 out of 10 times, I get to shower first when we reached home. He knows I don’t like to sit waiting for the shower. Very mundane thing, but a small act of consideration goes a long way.

3) He carries my bag. I know some are in disagreement on this. But I find it a gentlemanly act to help the girl carry her things/bags. One of the reasons I fell for him – He carried my books! If you are my era, you might remembered there was a trend of using elastic bands to tie our books together and carry them on our hands instead of in the bags. Kim always helped me with my tied-up books. Checked. Smile

4) He indulge me in the good things and provides for the family. Love alone cannot fill the stomach ya? He is known to be thrifty on his own expenses. But he will buy the best for me, the family and our extended families.

5) He allows me to eat! Ok, not too excessively! But he knows I enjoy my food. He did try to change me in the earlier days as he is the practical sort and subscribe to the “eat to live” thinking rather than “live to eat”. I belong to the latter and he soon learnt that almost nothing comes between me and my (yummy) food. hehehe.

6) He listens to me. Since we knew each other, we can talk and talk into the wee hours; even to the point of silence (when one of us fell asleep on the phone!). Till today, I am glad that he listens to me and my suggestions. Very often, that’s all women wants – to be heard? Smile

7) He humours me. In the literal meaning, he has a sarcastic sense of humour. And he makes effort to laugh at my jokes/actions to humour me.

8) He sings and play the guitar well. They say that music stirs the heart. And blessed with a good voice, he can be kind of charming when he sings.

9) He is the problem solver. Maybe it’s a man’s thing and a Godly man’s thing. Whether it’s a business problem I faced or the choked water pipe which needs fixing, he is my go-to person; not the plumber. hehe. I strongly believe the head of the household needs to be a good handyman too!

10) Last but not least, he loves me despite of all. And he never fails to remind me I won’t be able to find a person like him who can withstand my stubborn nature and loves me more than him. He’s probably right. hahaha.

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On our honeymoon to Eastern Europe – Year 2006

Xi En and Eizac, if you are reading this in the future, learn a trick or 2 from your Dad. Open-mouthed smile I hope you won’t start a relationship as early as Daddy and Mummy because we know the struggles of a marathon relationship. But I pray that when you are ready, you will learn to be a man who can be depended on, just like your Daddy. On the romantic part, ask your Mummy for tips. Open-mouthed smile

And to my friend of 20 years and husband of 10 years, Kim, Happy Sweet 10th Anniversary! Here’s to infinity. Smile

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Took a photo on 31st July 2014 at our alma mater which no longer stands at it’s old location

This is part of a blog train “How I met your Father” hosted by The Chill Mom

Tomorrow we have Janice Wong from Mishmashmess

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“I am a very exhausted full time working mom (FTWM), wife, crafter, blogger and educator who does everything just because she loves her family. I treasure this life which I have and do my utmost best to carve out as much as possible.”

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All in the months of Term 1

They say the children grows up really fast. And it is so true.

I always nag at my oldest boy: “You are already so ‘old’; you should know better than to do this (naughty behaviour/act).”

Then the next Facebook “moment flashbacks” reminded me that he was so small, so cute, so chubby, so mischievous before!

I guess this dilemma of wanting them to “grow up” and yet “don’t grow up too fast” will always remain a tussle in Mummy’s heart.


I am now a primary school kid’s mother. Aged. Promoted. Open-mouthed smile

Xi En eased in pretty well in primary school. We only knew that we were going to this school mid December last year and so there was a little rush to buy the uniforms and school books.

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First day of school – “mandatory photo”. Smile

The school is a 20-25 mins drive from our place. And that kind of made the school bus option undesirable. The school bus operator initially said they don’t ply our area and later said they can do special arrangements at $150 to $180 (one way trip!).

Cutting the story short, I join the ranks of many parents to be the “designated chauffeur”. 4 times a day, to and fro, I drove. It isn’t the driving that drove me mad at times. It is other drivers and the traffic. When you get impatient, zombie-like and running-late parents zipping around the school area, tempers rise and people flout traffic rules. That is my main grouse – driving into unreasonable drivers and also facing the madding morning traffic jams.

Awaiting keys to our new place so we can cut the journey shorter…..

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Dislike morning traffic jams

Get past the above, I enjoy the rides with my boy. It is those times that we chat about anything and everything.

We discussed about the new developments in Bidadari area; told him it was a cemetery; Mummy used to attend school near there; Bidadari meant “fairy” or “angel” in Malay. “What’s a cemetery?” It goes on… And many other questions like: “why the clouds looked so near yet so far?”

He is entertaining on most days. Smile

If you ran out of questions to ask your kids after school, this is a good guide. My favourite leading question will always be “anything interesting happened today?”


Term 1 in school ended easy with him making some new friends and enjoying school. Save that one occasion when I forgotten to pick him up from school, all went well.

It was early dismissal day, but this mother clearly forgotten so and was late by 1 hour.

Thankfully, I think God knows. Just a day before that, we went through what he should do if Mummy is ever late to pick him up. And the secret password that we set up in the event that he is approached by strangers who said they are there to pick him up. That fateful day Mummy was an hour late, he waited till the school gate was closed and asked a teacher to help to call me (I ignored the call because I was working!). Failing to reach me, he went to the general office and asked the kind receptionists to call me again. I was in a frantic when I received the call and realised it was early dismissal day. It was only the 2nd week of school when this happened. Mummy saved the day with a Mcdonald’s lunch treat. Open-mouthed smile

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Guilty Mummy’s treat

From then on, I followed a friend’s suggestion to set alarms on my phone to pick him up.

So much for a chauffeur’s day of work. Smile with tongue out


Now I understand why my friends said that primary one is a honeymoon. It is. At least term 1 was.

It helped that his kindergarten already started with some simple spelling and Ting Xie; coupled with the additional Chinese help he needed at an enrichment centre.

But his handwriting is horrible and he doesn’t seemed to think it is anything important. Daddy thinks that maybe he just has the handwriting of a doctor.

We started a reward chart for good behaviours and pro-activeness. It still worked for his age. His rewards range from buying an automatic sharpener to a tornado/spinning mop (he liked that innovation!) to an 1 hr usage of iPad to the newest Snap Circuit. So far, we do not have enough stars to buy a mop yet. Working on it.

We just had the first Parents-Teachers-Meeting (PTM). All good except he could probably work on socialising more with his friends.

His favourite recess food is noodles soup. Because there are fish balls and salty soup. Confused smile

It’s a consolation that at least he picks healthy drinks such as Milo or Yakult Active.

We have done away with homemade bentos and snacks. Not because his Mummy is lazy. But because he prefers hot food and the portions he eat are frightening small. So to save me from the heartache of throwing away left-over home cooked wonders, he decided that canteen food is good for him.

So much for me trying to score some Bento-Making-Mummy cookie points. *_*

p.s: thank you to all my friends who suggested where I can buy different kind of lunch boxes. I found good varieties in Sistema and Toyogo if you are looking. Smile

He gets $2 a day for recess time; an amount recommended by the school. For the records, it is sufficent to buy a meal + a drink. Most meals will cost between $1 to $1.50. Technically he only gets $1.90 per day. Thanks to intelligent mummies’ blogs, I sorted out his weekly pocket money in a box with a “SHARE” and a “SAVINGS” category. Initially, the “share” category was “tithe” but he didn’t quite grasp the concept of tithing yet. After reading an article in the newspaper, I realised “share” is easier to explain to young children. Now he set aside 10 cents per day for sharing with others such as the church, needy, the blind music busker he saw at the hawker centre and etc.

Hopefully this small act will teach him more on sharing and giving.

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Xi En’s weekly pocket money box

So far so good.

That’s for me and him. We have kind of assimilated to primary school life with adjustments to go along the way of course.

Looking forward to teenage-hood?! Open-mouthed smile

How was your Primary One schoolers’ term 1?

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Lunch treat at a cafe on our last day of Term 1.
I might draw this at home – for me; not him.

Lessons learnt from being a victim of theft from car / vehicle (And an update on the aftermath)

Never say never. This old adage is true.

Do you see such reminder signage around your Neighbourhood car parks (especially HDB flats?)

And dismissed it most of the time? I never expected to be the victim of a theft-from-car case.

This week, just when I was about to drive Xi En to school, he turned to me in shock that there is a hole at the back of the rear passenger seat. This is the smashed up window:

Smashed window

I was really puzzled why my car was the “chosen” one when there were so many other newer, more expensive, luxury cars in the carpark.

When I was at the police station, I told them there were signs of rummages through the items in the car boot, but nothing was lost. Cash card was there. Coins & car park coupons remained.

I left the police station with a nagging feeling that something is amiss but couldn’t pinpoint what it is.

Only when I reached home late afternoon, I realized what was wrong!! My work laptop was gone from its usual place in the study room!

This silly woman actually forgotten that she brought out the laptop and left it in the car!

Well… To save this woman some “face”, she seldom bring out the laptop & thus forgotten that it was even out of the house. And the rare occasion she brought it out to work, she (might) never see it again. I asked the police if they have ever met a person who didn’t know what was stolen. They managed a sheepish grin that made me felt worse.

And so, a second trip back to the police station ensured to lodge the report of the stolen laptop.

Besides the cost of replacing a broken window and a broken rear window wiper (thief likely used it as a tool to knock down the window), there is the cost of the laptop & the worst of all – lost data.

broken fragments of window & rear wiper

Learning from this eventful incident, here are some lessons to share.

7 tough-learnt lessons on how to prevent theft from cars / vehicles:

1) Never leave valuables in your car 

Low crime is not no crime in Singapore.

I forgot my laptop existence & thus didn’t bring it home. The first time I forgotten gave the thief the opportunity to act. So don’t ever try tempting vice by leaving valuables in the car unattended.

2) Try to park your car near police CCTVs

Most multi storey car parks are installed with police CCTVs near key entrance and exit points. Try to park your car in full view of such cameras if possible. Not the whole car park can be covered with CCTVs. My car was parked in a blind spot of such cameras.

Of course, you can’t always snag a lot near the CCTVs; and then again, the thieves might not even care having images caught. But reducing chances helped.

Police cctvs

3) Install an in-car built-in camera

The cost of installing a front and/or rear in-car camera isn’t that expensive. We procrastinated in doing so as our car is reaching its 10 years mark and we wanted to save some money and install cameras only in the next car.

I can’t say that a camera will help for sure. The thief could just whack it off & run away with it too? But possibilily it is a deterrence of sort?

4) Park in front of other cars

If you didn’t install a built-in camera, try parking near other cars; especially in front of other cars. There will be some chances that other cars might have a camera which hopefully is in recording function.

At the time of the incident, my car was parked facing a wall. There were cars next to me but only 1 car which has a camera. I left a note for the car owner to contact me, but alas his camera wasn’t recording!!

This car owner was actually a victim just like me. His rear car window was smashed in a similar fashion. It became obvious that it wasn’t a drunkard or some hooligans fighting which I initially thought so. He was luckier that nothing was missing from his car.

5) Cover your car boot

Most cars will have a pull-out cover which will enclose the boot from prying eyes. I didn’t have a habit of pulling it closed. The thief rummaged through my spare shoes and clothes left at the boot.

The other car owner told me that he had a big bag of spare stuff in the boot too. Possibly that was what caught the thief’s eyes too?

6) Back up your laptop/ iPad etc

The husband always nagged at me to ensure I backed up my laptop periodically. I always thought that there are other more important things to attend to than doing back ups.

And so a victim of my own procrastination, I lost about 1 year worth of information. Last back up was a year ago. Maybe the consolation is that I tend to horde email and is a traditional paper-filing person. Thus some of my “back ups” existed . Phew….

But learning from this, I think I will be a diligent digital back-up machine going forward!

What a rainy start to the Monkey Year! I told myself it can only get better? Or maybe the thief really needed some money? Some consolations.

Hope these will be useful to you for crime (and heartache) prevention too.

Now I need a new laptop.. And a new car maybe?

Stop gap measure

Update on1st March 2016:

Did the police catch the thief?

Yes! In fact, I found out that they caught the offender on the same night of the occurrence of the theft! What efficiency we have in our police force!

Not quite, wished that they caught up with the person before he sold my laptop to a random stranger in Geylang! Or maybe the police should have stopped the act while the theft was in action with their cameras! Ok – now I am complaining. I am just sore about my own oversight. Sad smile

Seriously, I was rather impressed with the fast actions coupled with some luck that the police had.

Understood that the perpetrator actually broke into another vehicle in another multi-storey carpark a street away. I am not sure if anything was lost though.

He is a male and a first-time offender. Thus the police didn’t find him on their records. Instead, they had a good clear picture of him caught on camera at the other carpark.

Using that photo, they found him! I am not sure how; it’s trade secret. Open-mouthed smile

But my poor laptop was probably sold within hours of the theft. It wasn’t revealed how much he got away with. But yes, he spent it all.

He will be charged in court and if found guilty, he will be sentenced. If he has any money to pay, I will be informed. If not, he will be serving jail terms in lieu.

I will get a letter to inform me of the final outcome.

That’s that.

I am glad that my laptop is password protected at the very least so that it is almost impossible to crack my password to get into my data. Probably the buyer of the stolen laptop will reformat and have a better use for it.

One last tip to leave for this incident:

7) Save copies of your laptop/mobile phones/tablets’ receipts.

The police asked if I kept a receipt which probably showed the serial number of the laptop. If I have it, it can listed as a stolen item and the police will be alerted if it is ever resold to authorised retailers. The chance is slim, but at least there is a “closure” for my laptop. But obviously, I didn’t keep the receipt as the laptop was bought some 3 to 4 years ago.

And that is another consolation; the husband bought me a new laptop earlier than scheduled. Smile

Now, I need a new car too. Smile