5 things I will do differently in 2015

“Auntie! Auntie!”

I heard a voice, a distance away; behind me, as I was walking quickly towards the lift.

I ignored the voice. That voice seemed to come from a teenager-of-sorts or an army boy.

Of course, I ignored it.

The only “Auntie”  I response to come from little children of my own kids’ age group.

The childish and innocent voices. “Auntieeee……” ; so cute lah!

Of course, I will stop my tracks to help a young little one.

“Auntie! Auntie! Xcuse me, Auntie!” the voice loomed nearer.

I walked a little faster (maybe too deliberately).

Wrong move, THE VOICE chased up with me.

I had to stop my pace unwillingly, turned around and quizzed at THE VOICE.

It turned out to be as I have expected : a teen boy who is probably 18 to 19 years old.

“Auntie ah, xcuse me ah, where is Blk 5?”

“I am not telling you.” haha!; his face is a concoction of panic and puzzlement; unsure of what he did wrongly.

“I am not telling you because you called me Auntie.” I retorted; looking annoyed but more teasingly.

“It’s over there, little boy. Next time try using Miss when you need help” I stopped myself from pointing to a different block! 😛

“Oh…sorrie sorrie ah, Thank you.”

#truestory


That was my story. I hit past mid 30s this 2015.

Time and tide waits for no man. Wrinkles and eye bags wait impatiently for all (most) women. They come in waves; oh so subtly sometimes. At least that’s true for me!

Admittedly I have aged; matured and it’s perhaps time to live my life a little different from past years.

So I purposed myself to join this blog train hosted by a fellow Mommy blogger – Rachel – to list down 5 (or 15) things that I will do differently in 2015. I couldn’t list 15 ‘cos I am not sure if I can keep to even 5!!

I seldom do New Year Resolutions. Simply because it never worked for me! The husband said it’s no discipline. I choose to think of myself as free-spirited; spontaneous! 😀

But here are 5 little things I will commit to doing differently this year in a bid for some form of improvements in my life.

1) Exercise

Commit to exercising at least once a week.  This is A LOT coming from one who don her short shoes possibly only once a year? Truly not ambitious in this area; but now that I said it – I will endeavour to do it. 😀

First step to “un-auntify” myself. Some say the glow from exercising makes you look and feel younger too!

Just to share – there are a few places providing FREE mass lessons in open areas if you are keen to try out a new sports/activity (such as badminton, yoga, zumba etc) for yourself or your children. One of them is the not-so-new Sports Hub. Check their website for more details.

Eizac

2) Healthier Eating habits

Most friends who know me well know that I can almost be bribed with (good) food. But with age catching up and metabolism losing steam, I am trying to be more selective; i.e. less processed, less salt, less oil, more vegetables, fruits. Actually eating less food will work in my case. haha..

As I am still managing medication for hyperthyroidism since the 2nd pregnancy, it is a gentle reminder that health is wealthier than wealth. So yes, if you must treat me, bring me healthier food options ya. 😛

3) Spiritual Food

After becoming a Mummy, my permanent place in church is the nursery room. It is all so good that the church caters to us, Mummies’ needs, and provide a live telecast so we can catch bits and pieces of the service while we chase after the toddler/s. But it is still so different when you can bask in whole praise/worship and etc. Then again, it doesn’t help that I am one who finds it hard to let go. Truth to be told, I just don’t trust anyone with my boys. They have to have only Mummy around with them. My mind would be travelling a thousand miles to the nursery room even if I get to sit in the main service.

But I know I have been far for a while. So, I will do it a little different this 2015. Read a different translation of the Bible, rely less on my own strength (and more of God’s) and remember my first love.

4) Slow to speak, quick to listen

Now’s what that? My long-time friends will know me as a sharp shooter, in words. But over the years, I have mellowed down (seriously yes!). Nevertheless, sometimes I still shoot myself for saying something totally wrong or sensitive without putting my pea-sized brain to work. It can be in the form of digital/print or verbal words. Often, it became more tedious trying to take the words back and mend the relationships or change the image that was being portrayed. The intent can be benign but the outcome deemed as malicious if the words and actions came out totally wrong.

This 2015, I will bite my tongue tighter and grow my ears that longer to listen well.

“Therefore, my dear brothers, let every person be quick to listen but slow to speak, slow to get angry;” James 1:19

5) Dating the husband

Last but not the least! I list it as the last of the 5 things because some might just scroll down to the bottom of the blog post to get the whole story without reading the body! hahaaa..

After 2 children, the couple dates are getting rarer if any to start with. I wrote this blog post on my sons’ future girlfriends and the husband always remind me that when the boys are all grown up, he will be the one still walking next to me! The hint is loud and clear. I better sow the seeds now!

And so my dear husband, this is for you. Let’s date more.. at least once a month? 😛

Jus the 2 of us


There goes my simple fiver list for 2015. Do you hope to do something differently in 2015 as well? Journey with the rest of the mommy bloggers in this blog train for some inspiration!

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Next up on this blog train is:

Felicia

Felicia Tan

A homeschooling mama of two. She aspires to nourish the heart, mind body and soul of her family. “The world is our school” is her mantra so be it a stroll to the market nearby or a vacation to Europe, she encourages curiosity and inquiry from her children. Her passion for cooking and healthy living drives her to churn out nutritious but easy-to-prepare meals so you can expect to see some healthy recipes on her blog. She also shares her parenting thoughts and learning activities as she goes about her journey and discovery as a homeschooling mama of Princess and The Rock.

Special Delivery

Following up from my last post, our darling little boy has arrived!

Eizac Chen Kai En – God’s special delivery to our home.

His birth story is not as eventful as his older brother’s (thankfully) but quite an experience by itself. Before my post-delivery cotton brains become more fluffy; here goes the story:

30th January 2013; 9am

It was Week 37 + 3 days of gestation for Baby Eizac. I had the next week planned out before the scheduled caesarean on 6th Feb 2013. There were a million and one more things to complete before Baby Eizac’s arrival. With the pending Chinese New Year festival season; we were trying to get ready for the festive days; settle Xi En into his not-so-new school + get ready the house & resources for Eizac’s arrival.

I drove Xi En to school at 9am and my mum decided to take the day off to visit my nephew in the west.

10:30am

Cleared most of my work-related matters. Passed some documents and keys to my colleague who drove by to take over my work. Settled down at home to finish up on my Korean drama serial. Last few episodes to go; best to finish up before my life is all about washing milk bottles; breastfeeding; soiled diapers and more soiled diapers. 😛

12-2pm

Had my lunch. I recalled it was instant noodles. Was hungry again at 130pm. Ate some chips and chocolates. Finally full by 2pm.

Decided to nap at 2pm. Such luxury is only reserved for the heavily pregnant. 🙂 Before I could even lie down on the bed, I felt a gush of discharge. Experience tells me it’s not too good.

Quick check in the loo to discover a river of unstoppable bleed.

That’s it – I told myself. Eizac must have decided to go heads on with the placenta!

It was a moment of panic. I was A.L.O.N.E at home. The hospital bag which was meant to be packed is still somewhere in my head.

I don’t want to be delivering my baby at home!

Breathe-in; Breathe-out; I told myself. Think straight. Yes – In & Out; In & Out (no, not the burgers!)

While trying to stop the bleed; I called 995. Amidst my panicky voice, I managed to tell the operator my address and explained the situation.

And amazingly; I managed to grab a bag and threw in most of the essential stuff which I might need (told you the hospital bag was “in my head”).

Called Kim next and told him baby’s on his way!

Sent a SMS to my obstetrician next.  I was so worried that she wasn’t back from her travels. She did highlighted that she was travelling during the week and I wasn’t sure if she was back in town.  Thankfully, she replied almost immediately to say she will see me directly at the delivery suite. Phew… it was a huge relief to know that my trusted obstetrician will be delivering Eizac.

210pm

Ambulance arrived with the paramedics in 10 mins flat. I managed to lug the bag, my tummy and myself to the door. The paramedics asked me to get onto the stretcher (propped in a sitting position).

I told them I need to lock the doors first because no one is at home. I wasn’t thinking straight I think. They scolded me and told me they will lock up. Asked me to get on asap.

Errm.. I forgot I called for help, hey. :S

230pm

It was taking so long to get to the hospital. I whipped out my trusty iPhone and turned on the GPS. Found out that the driver was taking a longer route than what I would have taken. Told the paramedics so and they assured me that the driver knew where he’s going. But of course.

Kim reached earlier than me. His cab was faster than the ambulance.

I arrived at the delivery suite by 230/240pm. It’s all so familiar again…. déjà vu. Seemed like just yesterday I was here; struggling with my first pregnancy.

Settled in; CTG machine on. I text Dr again to let her know I reached.

3pm

Dr came and did all the necessary checks. No dilation. CTG readings seemed ok. No distress signs.

She consulted with us and we all agreed to go ahead with the caesarean today. But my last intake of food was at 2pm and a safer guide will be to do the operation 6 hours after last meal.

Because of placenta previa major, she was undecided if we should go with an epidural or a full-on anaesthesia. The concern is – if the loss of blood was heavy during the caesarean; they would need to transfer me to another theatre and put me on anaesthesia to stop the bleeding.

After consultation with the anaesthetist, we opt for the half body epidural… first.

730pm

Dr came in again and said that we need to wait a while more for the operating theatre to be freed and the anaesthetist to finish up with the last operation.

And so we waited; I waited; Eizac waited.

750pm

Finally! Everyone was ready!

The nurses pushed me down the special passage way and handed over to the OT nurses. Kim was led away to another “secret” waiting area for all the daddies. He wasn’t allowed into the OT because we choose to be in a subsided ward + it was considered an emergency caesarean (again). He was happier this way ‘cos he’s not a huge fan of anything bloody (except medium-rare beef). 🙂

8pm

Though it wasn’t my first caesarean operation, I was still a pack of nerves.  There were at least 10 staff buzzing around in the theatre; doing their daily jobs; while I wait like a lamb to be slaughter. Ok; not really. Just almost akin to that. 😛

The anaesthetist was a confident man and called the shots in the theatre. He prepped and started off with the long needle.

One nurse was holding my shoulders to keep me from jerking (it was cold and I was all nerves). Another nurse came over and asked that nurse if she want to go for her break first; she can take over. “NO!” I almost screamed. I asked that 2nd nurse to go away. Leave the first nurse in her position. I can’t guarantee that I won’t move in the midst of the administration of the epidural! Don’t mess with a pregnant woman in the middle of a epidural administration! Grrrggg…..

815 – 830pm

Obstetrician came in her scrubs. Reassured me that she will do her best.

The assistant anaesthetist tested me with an ice pack. This time round, they waited for me to give an all-clear before Dr proceeded with her knife.

During Xi En’s time, I remembered they couldn’t wait for the whole effect of the epidural.

830pm – 850pm

I felt the tugs and nudges. Oh and the familiar coldness of the effect of the epidural.

They tug and pull and pushed. Finally, the anaesthetist (a slightly bigger-built guy) helped to push Baby Eizac from the upper half of my abdomen. Man.. he has some strength!

Wail!!!!!!!! I heard the cries. It’s so relieving to hear him. Dr exclaimed that he’s huge!

The nurses whisked him off for a clean up and checks. But they didn’t bring him back!!!

I thought this time round, I could have a warm fuzzy shot of my newly delivered baby on my chest. Ermm.. not so.

They didn’t tell me what happened. Just said that the doctor was checking him.

9pm

It was taking longer than usual to sew me up. I was staring at the clock and almost dozing off with the calming medicine they pumped into my iv drips.

Subsequently Dr told me that she purposefully waited to see if there were more bleeds before she proceeded with closing me up. Thank God, the bleeds from the placenta weren’t that bad.

Finally I was done. The nurses came back and told me that Eizac was sent to the Special Care Nursery (SCN) due to some breathing issues. My heart skipped a beat while I was sent to the recovery ward.

920pm

Dr came by to see how I was and told me she will help to go to SCN to check on Eizac.

She came back and reassured me that everything seemed fine. Eizac was opening his eyes and drinking milk while she was there.

It’s probably a transient issue.

950pm

I was sent to the post operating area (POA). It’s not the usual ward as Dr decided to be more careful due to my hyperthyroidism issue coupled with placenta previa major.

Kim came by and told me that he saw baby Eizac.

He’s so cute and round! Of a very healthy weight too – 3.235kg! 51cm.

All was good. They just need to keep him in SCN for a night to observe him further.

31st April 2013

Baby Eizac Chen Kai En – our 2nd precious darling boy – was discharged from SCN.

Both of us were finally in the regular wards.

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It’s day 51 today and he went through 6 jaundice and 2 thyroid checks. We were in and out of KKH and the polyclinic throughout Chinese New Year till now.

Finally his prolonged jaundice was cleared up after 1+ month and the doctor gave him an all clear for his thyroid panels as well.

He’s a cute little bundle of joy and I am so happy to celebrate motherhood 2nd time round!

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Counting days and … Hope

It’s been months since I last blogged.

Approximately 5 months since the last proper entry on the hospitalisation of my boy. That was some drama on it’s own. But thank God, thus far, he had been kept out of trouble and we are doing the best to prevent any illness of any sorts.

We are happiest when he’s healthy. Smile

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Behind the silence, there were some events unfolding. I don’t know what to say.. not sure if I want to share. Or rather, perhaps we are weary.. of unforeseeable circumstances again….

I was diagnosed of hyperthyroidism about the same time that Xi En was warded in the hospital. It’s something I have never heard of…. didn’t even know where my thyroid is located! Blamed the fact that I didn’t study biology.  Simply put, it is the disorder of thyroid glands which are located near the lower part of  one’s neck.  It’s also commonly know as Grave’s disease named after the person who discovered this disorder. Not the most hopeful name in my opinion.

My condition was picked up by a routine medical check-up which I had postponed for ages. The doctor broke the news to me while I was in Shanghai and that’s when I realised the reason behind the tell-tale symptoms such as heart palpitation, sweaty palms, hand tremors, irritability and etc. These were subtle symptoms which I had conveniently ignored for months; attributing them to lack of sleep, overworked and maybe just the usual-me!

The doctor advised me to seek treatment as soon as possible as my marker readings were over the roof. It’s about 100X higher than the tolerance levels. It’s a miracle I haven’t collapsed on the streets. But of course, warning from the doctor was enough to trigger a chain of actions once I came back to Singapore. I consulted my regular GP, the polyclinic and (im)patiently waited for an appointment at SGH to see an endocrinologist. All these while my boy was doing his best to recover in KKH.

The GP could have given me a regular medicine to counter the disease as I found out that it is pretty common among women to have thyroid disorders. But all are complicated by the fact that we were planning for a second baby. The dates were not aligned for me to know if I was pregnant or not. And certain thyroid medicine is not safe for a growing foetus. Thus I went from the GP to the polyclinic and ended up with an endocrinologist at SGH.  The endocrinologist is a pleasant, well-meaning lady who advised me against having a baby at this time. The body is not at it’s best stage. Lot of medicine to take to bring things under control and etc.. In her words: “Would be a silly idea to have a baby now.” That of course I understood and agreed. She packed me home after ordering a pregnancy test (to be sure) coupled with a huge stack of medicine which even the pharmacist questioned if I needed that much medication!

Armed with all that, I went home that day and ready to pop some pills. I am good with pills; a pill-popper. Well trained from my days in KKH. Smile

Less than 2 hours later, the endocrinologist called my mobile….. my heartbeat stopped for that few seconds. I think I knew what’s coming. The test result came out positive! No words of congratulations; just words of advice to reduce my pills dosage and to see an obstetrician as soon as possible. She said “We can only take it one day at a time…”

Jackpot! Or is it Murphy’s Law? Of course, I was thrilled with having a 2nd child whom we had wanted. But the coincidence of having an untreated illness together with the unknown fact of how it will affect my baby… it’s just too much to be overjoyed. The next thing I did – I texted Kim – “you are going to be a father, 2nd time”…… He called back immediately; same reactions as me. As any normal parents-to-be, we were happy but anxiety filled the air too.

We went on to understand that I have to continue with the thyroid medicine (Propylthiouracil – PTU). That is the safest medicine for pregnancy. But all medicine would cross over the placenta nonetheless and reached the baby. In other words, there is a chance that the baby might be born with hyperthyroidism or hypothyroidism (the opposite). There are other potential risks such as the body rejecting the pregnancy, low birth weight, premature birth; developmental issues and etc.. The list goes on… more than what we were prepared to hear.

Bringing the story closer to now, I am still carrying my 2nd BOY (yes, he’s a boy; another strong one again). Smile Currently at 24 weeks gestation, he had braved through the odds. I wasn’t concerned about temporary common symptoms of pregnancy such as nauseas; lack of energy etc. Instead, I was constantly wary of blood and the amniotic fluid. My first pregnancy taught me too much…. Thank God all went well from then…. just 1 episode of bleeding brought me to A&E; I am thankful enough.

It’s nerves wrecking though……. Pregnancy that is……..

A few days back, I had a growth scan to ensure that baby 2 is doing well in my womb. I always held my breath during these scans; because I knew well enough now what the sonographers were looking for…. This time, she focused on the placenta. Something wasn’t quite right but she wasn’t saying. We waited to see our favourite obstetrician to understand more. The condition is known as Placenta Previa Major or more commonly known as Complete Placenta Previa. I asked a few times if it’s just a low lying placenta which I vaguely heard before. But she reiterated that it’s “major”. A goggle search later gave me the full realisation that it’s the ultimate form of placenta previa – where the placenta is covering the entire cervix. This condition should had been picked up in earlier scans but then again, it might had just added on earlier to my long list of worries. Accordingly to the doctor, she said there’s nothing that can be done. It’s how the conception went which determined the position of the placenta. In some cases, the placenta might move upwards during the 3rd trimester aided by the growing uterus. It’s a slim chance though.

*The risks of such condition include:

  • problems for the baby, secondary to acute blood loss
  • Intrauterine growth restrictions due to poor placenta perfusion
  • increased incidence of congenital anomalies
  • life-threatening haemorrhage for the mother
  • increased risk of postpartum haemorrhage
  • increased risk of placenta accreta
  • caesarean delivery

*source: http://pregnancy.about.com/cs/placentaprevia/a/previa.htm

placenta-previa[1]

It’s another bomb shell to our current situation. As if it’s not enough to deal with Grave’s. We don’t need this; we don’t want this. We don’t need more. We just want a healthy baby.

All we have asked for is a normal pregnancy. I envied those who can go for babymoons; carry their baby to full term; go about doing their daily work and etc. When some friends complained how their baby bump is heavy and how they can’t wait to give birth and etc… quietly I wished they could understand that their “misery” is what some other mummies can’t even choose to go through.

But amidst all, we are HOPEFUL. We are praying. In the same light as my PPROM story, we believe in miracles; in the heart of God even when we can’t see the hands of God.

Little baby 2 is due in mid Feb 2013. We are believing in HOPE.

HOPE with us. Smile

“ Rejoice always, pray continually, give thanks in all circumstances; for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus” 

1 Thessalonians 5: 16-18 (NIV)